|
Blonde Jokes
|
| Sass |
Posted on 20-06-2008 22:17
|
FORUM ADDICT!
Posts: 1804
Joined: 10.09.07
|
A PLANE IS ON ITS WAY TO HOUSTON WHEN A BLONDE IN ECONOMY CLASS GETS UP AND MOVES TO THE FIRST CLASS SECTION AND SITS DOWN.
THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT WATCHES HER DO THIS AND ASKS TO SEE HER TICKET. SHE THEN TELLS THE BLONDE THAT SHE PAID FOR ECONOMY CLASS AND THAT SHE WILL HAVE TO SIT IN THE BACK. THE BLONDE REPLIES, "I'M BLOND, I'M BEAUTIFUL, I'M GOING TO HOUSTON AND I'M STAYING RIGHT HERE."
THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT GOES INTO THE COCKPIT AND TELLS THE PILOT AND THE CO-PILOT THAT THERE IS A BLONDE BIMBO SITTING IN FIRST CLASS THAT BELONGS IN ECONOMY AND WON'T MOVE BACK TO HER SEAT
THE CO-PILOT GOES BACK TO THE BLONDE AND TRIES TO EXPLAIN THAT BECAUSE SHE ONLY PAID FOR ECONOMY SHE WILL HAVE TO LEAVE AND RETURN TO HER SEAT.
THE BLONDE REPLIES, "I'M BLONDE, I'M BEAUTIFUL, I'M GOING TO HOUSTON AND I'M STAYING RIGHT HERE."
THE CO-PILOT TELLS THE PILOT THAT HE PROBABLY SHOULD HAVE THE POLICE WAITING WHEN THEY LAND TO ARREST THIS BLONDE WOMAN WHO WON'T LISTEN TO REASON.
THE PILOT SAYS, "YOU SAY SHE IS A BLONDE? I'LL HANDLE THIS. I'M MARRIED TO A BLONDE. I SPEAK BLONDE."
HE GOES BACK TO THE BLONDE AND WHISPERS IN HER EAR, AND SHE SAYS, "OH, I'M SORRY." AND SHE GETS UP AND GOES BACK TO HER SEAT IN ECONOMY.
THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT AND CO-PILOT ARE AMAZED AND ASKED HIM WHAT HE SAID TO MAKE HER MOVE WITHOUT ANY FUSS.
.
.
.
.
.
I TOLD HER, "FIRST CLASS ISN'T GOING TO HOUSTON." |
| |
|
|
| JugglingSpence |
Posted on 20-06-2008 22:20
|
Home From Home
Posts: 271
Joined: 05.10.07
|
What do you call a blonde that dyes her hair brown?
Artificial intelligence. |
| |
|
|
| JugglingSpence |
Posted on 20-06-2008 22:22
|
Home From Home
Posts: 271
Joined: 05.10.07
|
What do you call a blonde sat between 2 brunettes?
A mental block. |
| |
|
|
| Sass |
Posted on 20-06-2008 22:34
|
FORUM ADDICT!
Posts: 1804
Joined: 10.09.07
|
A blonde was speeding on the highway when a police car pulled her over.
The policeman walks up to the blonde and says "Excuse m'am, could I please see your driving license and registration."
The blonde looks at the policeman angrily and says "I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!" |
| |
|
|
| Welshy |
Posted on 20-06-2008 23:16
|
Home From Home
Posts: 479
Joined: 02.05.08
|
IRISH BLONDE IN A CASINO
An attractive blonde from Cork arrived and bet twenty-thousand dollars on a single roll of the dice, at the casino.
She said, 'I hope you don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I'm completely nude'.
With that, she stripped from the neck down, rolled the dice and yelled,'Come on, baby, Mama needs new clothes!'
As the dice came to a stop, she jumped up and down and squealed...'YES! YES! I WON, I WON!'
She hugged each of the dealers and then picked up her winnings and her clothes and quickly departed.
The dealers stared at each other dumbfounded. Finally, one of them asked, 'What did she roll?'
The other answered, 'I don't know - I thought you were watching.'
MORAL OF THE STORY -
Not all Irish are stupid and not all blondes are dumb, but all men are men.
Fortune Favours the Brave... |
| |
|
|
| Fat-Dart |
Posted on 21-06-2008 03:22
|
FORUM ADDICT!
Posts: 1308
Joined: 05.10.07
|
What do you call an intelligent blonde?
A Golden Retriever |
| |
|
|
| Welshy |
Posted on 01-08-2008 20:29
|
Home From Home
Posts: 479
Joined: 02.05.08
|
A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's office and says that her body hurts whenever she touches it.
Impossible! Says the doctor. 'Show me
The redhead takes her finger, pushes on her left breast and screams. Then she pushes her elbow and screams in even more agony.
She pushes her knee and screams; likewise she pushes her ankle and screams.
Everywhere she touches makes her scream.
The doctor says, "Your not really a redhead, are you?
'Well no" she says, "I'm actually a blonde."
"I thought so", the doctor says.
"Your Finger is Broken?.
Fortune Favours the Brave... |
| |
|
|
| EmDee |
Posted on 01-08-2008 22:15
|
Home From Home
Posts: 349
Joined: 07.10.07
|
What do a peroxide blonde and a Boeing 747 have in common?
The black box... |
| |
|
|
| Shaggy |
Posted on 01-08-2008 22:44
|
Must Get Out More
Posts: 888
Joined: 02.10.07
|
I thought it was going to be What is the difference between a blonde and a 747.
The blonde doesnt shout Mayday when shes going down.
House!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
| |
|
|
| EmDee |
Posted on 01-08-2008 23:02
|
Home From Home
Posts: 349
Joined: 07.10.07
|
hehe
okay, if you are sensitive to dirty jokes, look away now - time for the big guns:
what do a blonde and a fridge have in common?
they both leak when they're fcuked...
what's the difference between a blonde and a fridge?
the fridge doesn't fart when you pull your meat out...
whats the difference between a blonde and a tumble dryer?
you can drop your load in a tumble dryer and it won't follow you around all week...
 |
| |
|
